Category Archives: Jesus

Dramas: Loving Me & The Things I Hate About Me

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I hate that I’m the one to always reach out…

…that I seem to love harder than ppl seem 2 love me…
…that my heart is as big and as open as it is…and that I can’t help but show it…
…that I cry over the sunrise and Kleenex commercials…
…that I am either hot or cold…
…that there is no gray area…
…that I am so expressive…
…that I oftentimes want more for others than they want for themselves…
…that I find it easier to encourage/support others more than I encourage/support myself…
…that I…
…that I still struggle with loving the things I hate about myself.
But because I realize Who created me, I am learning to love me, and all of the things I hate about me…
…because all of these things, are what make me me.
I understand that my heart is open in a world so easily closed off to the warmth of a full heart…

…that people may not know how to love…
…that maybe I can show them how…
…that God gave me arms for reaching…especially for those who pull away…
…that it’s my responsibility to teach people how to love me…
…that sometimes, people want more for me than I want for myself…
…that people know they can count on me for encouragement and support…
…I am learning to love me…in spite of me.

To love me just as God created me to be.
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Today Is When

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Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Today is when your life is happening. Now is when life’s opportunities are yours.

Within you is a dream, a longing, a purpose, a desire to experience life’s richness in your own unique way. Surrounding you is a universe filled with energy and abundance, and possibilities.

Now is when you have the opportunity to connect your most treasured dreams with that abundance, and to bring them to life. Focused, purposeful, inspired action is how you can most effectively do so.

On this day, in this moment, the possibilities are more than just intellectual curiosities. Right now, the possibilities are real.

Today you can choose, you can take action, you can make a difference and you can make real, satisfying, lasting progress. Today you have the priceless opportunity to live your life as you envision it.

The best life you can imagine is today within your grasp. So go beyond mere imagining, and live each moment in the direction of the very best you know life can be.

— Ralph Marston

The words above are one of those “right on time” posts.  An email sent to me from a friend. Although I was included as part of her daily mass email, receiving this one is like sitting in church with a thousand other people but feeling like the preacher is speaking directly to you. This goes beyond assumed fortune cookie type coincidence, not that I believe that anything is by happenstance or coincidence but this truly spoke to me.

Recently being bombarded with feelings of inadequacies and doubts I have come to the realization (again perhaps…) that I have a terrible habit of limiting myself in an attempt to avoid disappointment. I’m certain that I’m not alone in my feelings but I don’t want anyone to live according to the limitations of doubt and fear. In order to truly experience the full manifestation of the promises of God, we have to overcome our uncertainties.

Our confidence in God comes when we truly seek to live according to His will for our lives. Today, I choose…faith.

Seeking Spirituality

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I understand what you mean having been tired of “church as usual” and “religion” myself. There was a time in my early 20’s that I found myself not only tired of church folk and religion but I had allowed the world to convince me that Jesus wasn’t truly the Son of God and that there was only one God and so on and so forth.

Being an artist of sorts I found myself surrounded by wonderful, loving, “good” people who were educated with worldly knowledge of astrology, numerology, multiple languages and religions. I was impressed by their knowledge and eventually, I also found myself questioning who Christ was, who He is and questioning the relationship with God that comes from truly knowing Him.

A few years ago when I was working at Smokey Bones, there was a young man named Chris who worked as a busser and was kinda all over the place. He was about 19 years old and a total sweetheart but he was young and didn’t know. We never disagreed on anything, unless he hadn’t been bussin’ my tables all night and asked for a tip out…boy please!? Lol

Anyway, Chris knew I was a follower of Christ and we would often have conversations based on my relationship with Christ and the difference between religion and relationship.  One day, Chris came to me proudly and let me know that he was looking into becoming a Buddhist. I was like, “Okay…why’s that?” I believe that regardless of what you’re into, you ought to be able to support your thinking and beliefs…not to argue with other people, but to make certain that YOU are into. So he responded that he liked Buddhism because of its’ principles based on peace, love and such. And I listened…and after he was done I said, “Okay, so basically, Buddhism has the same principles as Christianity but with Christianity, you have a Savior in Jesus.”  He sat there for a second and replied, “Well yeah, I guess you’re right…”

The problem with Christianity is that it was never meant to be a religion.  In the Bible, you never saw Jesus say ANYTHING to the disciples about starting a religion the way we’ve made it.  Yes we, along with the disciples, were commanded to “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations…teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you.” But that’s all we have been commanded to do besides loving one another as He loves us. MAN made the religion but GOD wants a relationship. 


I say all of this to just say, be careful in your quest for spiritual truth and peace with people.  People get sick of the same old stuff in church and then LEAVE the church!? But we NEED people who aren’t “religious” in the church! We need people who are truly seeking God and who truly love Him and are willing to be a light to not only the world, but to “the saints” who are also a part of the world.  We need people with a heart like yours that long to be reconciled with God and who are willing and able to share the Truth of the Gospel with them. 

Don’t allow yourself to get discouraged in your growing spiritually. As for all the other “religions” and spiritual practices that are out there and seem harmless, again I say, just be careful as you gain knowledge from man.  Continue to study but make certain you are also filling yourself with the Word to stay grounded while you’re learning more about the world that you were physically born into.

If you ever need anything or have questions, please don’t hesitate to holler at me. I’m not your normal “church folk” but I LOVE me some Jesus just the same and am trying with all my might to find a balance between my human me and my spiritual me!